First, get your hormone levels checked, and dive into literature and experiences from other women. Based on what I read on TRT forums, many women feel optimal at a testosterone level higher than the so-called "normal" range. The normal range is based on women of various ages, many of them on birth control, which lowers testosterone and often kills libido, so it is likely that the optimal range would be higher than what's considered "normal". Even if the doctor says your level is normal, it can easily be low enough to give you problems, and you could possibly benefit from TRT (women usually start with low dose propionate because it's easy to stop or decrease the amount if unwanted side effects occur, and it's easier to measure a small enough dose). And it's also important that you have a good ratio of T, E and P, all three are important. Only you and a good, modern doctor can tell that after extensive testing. Find a real hormone specialist with experience if you can, or if they aren't available, you are going to do a lot of self-experimentation work.
If you take birth control, that can easily cause this, and recovery may take a year after you stop taking it. There can also be a ton of stressors in life that makes it very hard to focus on sex, especially if you are carrying the household work for two people.
If you are eating low calories, that will also cause this, and the bad effects can linger for years. Sometimes women have to choose between being thin and having a bearable quality of life. Better to check all of your hormones, not just the sex hormones, as even thyroid (or adrenal, that is completely ignored) or other problems can cause this.